My learnings from Pregnancy- Trimester 1

.....typed on 01st of April 2018 from hand written notes.

Trimester one of pregnancy is said to be nothing like the first Semester of Academics. It’s believed you don’t really get the time to ease into it. They call it brutal. Well I am here to tell you otherwise. Not everyone has Hyperemesis Gravidarum. All of my adult life, I imagined I would throw up crazy with morning sickness  if and when I get pregnant. Nothing happened. So please know that some people do get lucky and not every woman is a puke-y oversensitive mess. People just don’t talk about the good ones that often.

By the time you come to know you are pregnant, 7-8 weeks are already gone. Poof! That’s most of first trimester gone. And traditionally morning sickness fun starts after those 8 weeks. So from 8-12 weeks is hell for most pregnant woman. This makes me wonder what if a women knew she was pregnant from early on, say pre-8 weeks, would there be morning sickness from early on, in that case?  Why does it happen as soon as we know we are pregnant? Is it because we are half expecting it to happen or is it some specific physiological changes that happen between week 8-12? When you don’t know you’re pregnant, most symptoms would be disregarded and brushed aside. Who knows! I’ve spent most of my pregnancy being relaxed about it and not using Dr Google, so I’ll leave this here, without any explanation, simply because I didn’t research it any further. I’m a chronic back pain survivor and I truly believe in the power of mind to make us believe. But I'm also not going to trivialize anyone's morning sickness by sitting here on my high horse, just coz I got lucky, by chance. 

Well, just so I don’t get to claim a morning sickness free pregnancy, I experienced it for one day in Week 13. You know that week most women are getting over it. It certainly wasn’t pretty and it scared me shit! I have all my sympathies for women who go through that giddy feeling day in & day out of their pregnancy. That day I kept wondering, will it last for next few weeks now? Is my good run over? But it lasted only a day and I was granted mercy. Let me go into details of it though. It’s not your usual puke! C’mon I know you wanna know about this! So, I clearly remember what I ate the night before, coz I never reached for that combo again. Something I’ve been eating for years as my quick no-fuss dinner. 2 boiled eggs + some Indian curry. That is all. Nothing fancy. Nothing I ate for the first time. But certainly not my favourite dinner. I was stuffing myself and not really enjoying it. You know I’m a Roti girl.

I woke up next morning, feeling very giddy. Drank a few sips of water in bed. Got up and started getting ready for work. My usual 5:40 am routine. I still felt sick and giddy, so I decided to force out vomit so I could breathe a little. It happened. A glut of transparent water-like fluid. Not a trace of food particle. Just water! I’m thinking hang on..I just took a few sips of water a minute or two ago. Where did all this extra water come from. Anyway, I feel a lil better after this and go to work (I’m a tough cookie). At work, I googled about that transparent liquid. It’s BILE. So when your stomach runs out of food to digest (during night), the gastric juices keep going on by themselves. Lesson learnt. NO light dinners ever again & no force feeding myself food that I don’t look forward to or enjoy! As I was anxious and giddy all day, I googled various remedies. Going swimming was one and so I did. It did provide temporary relief, at-least for the time I was in the pool. Overall, I’m so lucky that it only lasted a day and it was just one throw up early in the morning. I didn’t lose my appetite even on that day and ate as normal, albeit feeling giddy all day. If that’s what morning sickness looks like for weeks on end, I’m the luckiest girl alive!
Lesson: Eat small meals throughout the day. Don’t starve yourself. Don’t run on empty stomach. Ever!

Every pregnancy is different and symptoms are different too. I didn’t get morning sickness but I got something else a little less exciting, though annoying and painful. Sore boobs! For weeks on end. When I’m about to get periods, sore boobs happened for 3-4 days & that was my indication of bloody times to come. In pregnancy that symptom lasted for weeks on end. In-fact it was my first indication that something wasn’t normal. Having them for many weeks straight made me do the pregnancy test in week 8 & voila! it was confirmed. I had this painful symptom from like Week 5 to about Week 14. They weren’t just sore, they got big too. Well! That happened fast. I might be a procrastinator but my body wasn’t. It started preparing for feeds from way early on! I am not the motherly type, I’ve not been around pregnant women or new-borns, EVER!! so this symptom took me by surprise (until Dr Google confirmed). The naive me assumed a switch flicked when baby is born and voila MILK!! But no, your body prepares for it very early on. Boosting your lactation glands and adding more fat to provide for those testing times to come. So naturally all my bra’s got super tight. Google suggested switching to without underwire ones. I kept on with my wired ones. I couldn’t wait to come back home and break free though. After first trimester, the pain subsided, the size stayed. Did I buy new lingerie? NO! I’m a tough cookie. Lingerie doesn’t come cheap & I was determined to do with the ones I own already. My $50 a piece Berlei! They are a life saver I tell you. Serena Williams endorses them, I’m sold! That is the only brand I’ve worn in last 5 years. Because I am a stubborn Indian b*tch, I did what I do best..jugaad! Buy bra extender hooks- a pack of 3 for $7 from Kmart. It worked! This made me realize how good a investment good quality bra’s are. The mesh netting thingy accommodated increased cup size. As my girth and fat on body increases more, I’d probably need to buy another pack of bra extenders. And hey! For those of you drawn to this idea, the extender hooks come in two size settings. So make sure you buy right ones so you don’t have to go back to Kmart again #FirstWorldProblems. I’m so glad the pain and soreness has subsided and I only have to deal with a bigger size and increasing girth as of now. 

A lot happened in 2 years prior to this pregnancy milestone in my personal, financial and physical health and I truly believe all of it prepared me for these times. No wonder little pains and discomforts were shushhed aside. The chronic back pain for an year and half & the miraculous healing that followed. The discovery of the power of my mind. My renewed focus on mental health and consulting a therapist to work on my social anxieties. Reading many self help books. Reading 'A case against Fragrance' by Kate Greenville and going off artificial scents entirely. Focus on health & fitness by resorting to sustainability and genetics based eating (Rujuta Diwekar is probably the second most influential woman in my life after my mum). The trial and error and failing to conceive for 10 months. The almost giving up and exploring IVF. The decision to not go through IVF or any other artificial means. The acceptance of my body and its fate and just trusting in destiny and the course it takes. If a baby were to happen, it'll happen naturally. The financial struggles, deals gone wrong, the tough times. All the events of past 2 years- good, bad, painful, stressful and ugly prepared me for this surge of hormones and I sailed through just fine. No morning sickness, next to nothing pains and cramps and a surge in energy instead of the opposite. Blessed indeed!

A few lessons I've learned- don't google every symptom (infact stay off Google entirely), No light dinners, no missed meals, keeping my calm and being active as normal. Here's hoping the good run continues in second and third trimester.

Nishu

P.S. The baby is called Blueberry, coz the day we found out about the baby, it was size of blueberry. Also my favourite fruit and goes well with my blog name too.

If you haven't figured out from the blog yet, I'd break it to you. I write for myself. Documenting my life on my blog. A place where I do come back when nostalgia hits. When I miss dressing up Indian, I would go through blog posts that I wrote about my sisters wedding or my best friends.
Below are the pictures that I might look back someday as my child-free life. Pictures when I was pregnant and didn't know. Picture taken at 5 am the day I tested positive for pregnancy test and the days that followed. Here's my pregnancy Trimester 1 timeline.

Dec 23, 2017. Best buddies Sangeet. Hoshiarpur, India. 2 weeks pregnant- Obviously I didn't know.

Dec 24, 2017. Best buddies wedding. Patiala, India. 2 weeks pregnant. Funny I called my muffin top as food baby that day!

Jan 1, 2018. Jalandhar, India. 2 best friends, blissfully unaware that they are both pregnant.

Jan 4, 2018- Jaisalmer, India. 4 weeks pregnant. No wonder I felt a lil sick during the trip. 

Jan 14, 2018. Doing my sisters maternity shoot, unaware that I'm 6 weeks pregnant

Jan 16, 2018. Delhi, India. Shayoni (Sweet & Bitter Blog) was the first person I told that I've missed my period

Jan 24, 2018. 5 am. The day it was confirmed. 7 weeks pregnant.A day before my grand-dad passed away.

Jan 28, 2018. Home. My focus clearly changed to wearing the clothes I wouldn't fit into a few months later. 

Feb 2, 2018. Our 4th marriage anniversary and the first time we saw tiny blueberry, a mere blob of cells.

Feb 4, 2018- Tauranga, NZ. Pre-birthday hang-outs. That tee shirt won't fit me anymore. 9 weeks pregnant.

Feb 5, 2018- Coromandel, NZ- Pre-birthday hang-outs. 

Feb 6, 2018. Home. Birthday. Wore this dress only because I'd never ever fit into it again. 9 weeks pregnant.

Feb 17, 2018. Home. 11 weeks pregnant. 

Feb 23, 2018. 12 weeks pregnant. Wearing the south indian dress that Aishwarya gifted me, to a NZBloggers Brunchclub event. 

Feb 25, 2018. Hare Krishna Temple, Auckland. Holi Event. Wasn't in mood to go but went for it as it was probably my last time at the event. 12 weeks pregnant.

March 7, 2018. The end of first trimester scan. The prettiest picture of Blueberry. 13 weeks. 

March 11, 2018. Telling my best friends of our pregnancy. Told our family the same day. Week 13.